t.i.f.f.

for kevin gill

i asked a pretty girl in the street
for a cigarette once
but she didn't have one
then a paparazzi snapped a photo of us
she was a very polite girl
with a playful demeanor
pretty as sin

soon after, my friend
really gave it to me
"do you know who that was?" he cried
i just shrugged
"heather fucking graham,
that was heather fucking graham, dude"
oh yeah?
"you don't just waltz up to heather graham
and casually ask for a cigarette"
hmm, i drew a blank
he listed off all of the films she had starred in
it was an impressive list
but i was still without a smoke

the next day in check-out lines
of supermarkets somewhere in america
ladies with too much make-up and poor diets
ogled over trashy headlines
"heather graham's new mystery man"
it might have read
spelled out in bold red lettering

i guess i couldn't be reached for comment
better to keep em guessing i suppose
i'm sure her press agent had plenty to say